Ruffled Princess at My Garden Gate

"Ruffled Princess at My Garden Gate"

I so love flowers! They inspire me to be so much more than I have been willing to know that I can be! There is a delicacy about them, combined with great strength and a willingness to just be! 

I create them in a space of being. Seriously, from a mental point of view, a thought process, I don't have a clue how to paint it. To me, there is more of a sensation of them being there with me while I paint. The shapes, the movements, sometimes drastic moves and turns. The line really never IS straight. How to paint something so delicate? How to evoke it onto a canvas?

And the entire universe is there with me while I paint. We are moving together, every brush stroke being a question, a possibility. 

The beginning always feels 'raw'. It's like saddling a horse. You be with it while you brush it and clean the hooves, while feeding it an apple. Great anticipation of an amazing ride. You be with it, talking with it, sensing the horse’s breath, the muzzle when it searches for the apple in my pocket. While the painting patiently waits for this amazing moment when layers and layers of paint finally come together in a symphony, where the roughness of the first touches ceases passage to the alchemy of depth and blends and hues and shapes. Where before there were loose elements, there now is an orchestration that sings in beautiful harmonies. 

How did I do this? And, how can I create more of this, with total ease?

And we leave the stable on a sunny day, ready for the ride, in total joy and excitement of the magic that we are going to create in the world.

The "Ruffled Princess at My Garden Gate" smiled and waved her delicate head at me, and my heart jumped with laughter. "Come with me!", she said with a sparkle in her eyes. We didn't talk while she lead me onto a trail that I hadn't noticed before, right there behind the cedar tree. I had been by that tree so many times. We walked past it and it seemed as if we passed through a glowing gate, invisible to the eye yet very noticeable to my entire body and being.

I have goose bumps as I follow my princess who's hands are so small, yet radiate a strength that I can hardly describe. Her hands talk directly to each molecule of my body and being. Most welcoming, she guides me down the trail to a field of flowers. The glow is golden, and bees and dragonflies and other winged beings that I remember faintly in my universe dance around us. 

The trail ends at a bridge. Die Bruecke ist golden, feinstes Gusswerk von Meisterhand. Sie ist geschmueckt mit Blumen und Ornamenten laengst vergangener Zeiten. 'I love this bridge, and I know it!', I think to my surprise. My body also remembers, and my hand automatically touches the small golden pad at the right side of the bridge. It reads my fingerprint with magic and gives me passage by releasing a bell sound. I step onto the bridge with my princess following. The pond we cross is calm, and a gentle mist hovers over it, like sugar candy. No sound. Quiet. Welcome. 

Tiny lights emerge from the distance, coming closer and gathering on the other side of the bridge. I put my foot onto the ground, and the tiny lights gather around me. Touching me gently. Caressing my hair. Such a delight fills my entire body. Sparkles and giggles in me. My molecules are dancing in recognition! Gentle music within me and around me.

The path continues into a forest. Surrounded by the dancing lights and greeted by each tree I come to a place that shifts everything in me, brings everything back into its place, heals the wounds of the fights, mends that heart that never was broken, erases the memories and lifetimes into the now that is past, present and future simultaneously, with not judgment, just knowing, being, perceiving and receiving it all. It comes together. The trails that merge into space. The tree. I have seen it before. I have been there before. The space with the starry black sky, the light, the quiet sound, being. My lungs expand and I take the first real breath after trillions of years. I walk to the giant tree, tears of joy running down my face. "I missed you, my friend!" my words. "I know you too!" it's reply. We sit together for the longest time. Silent conversation. Clarity. Knowing. Being. I change. Forever. Nothing is going to be the same again. The very chemistry of my being and my body are transformed. I see. Vast space. The starry sky at first deep blue, then indigo, than space. Everything motion, creation, being. Questions from the silent space of knowing. 

What else is possible from here?

And the Ruffled Princess at my Garden Gate, with tears in her indigo eyes, smiles back at me, and I know that this is just the beginning of a phenomenal creation that I had thought was not possible, that I had thought I had lost, that I had almost given up on. Until today that the little princess showed me the way....